14 again.

It's happening again, but this time I know I have the power and the knowledge to change things, to make sure the results don't end her in the hospital. But I'm afraid. I'm not a registered nurse or have much knowledge of mental disorders, but I've seen the damage it can do, and I'm fucking terrified. I don't want to go through that terror all over again, the hushes, the paranoia, the police men and the ambulance. No, not again. 

I have plans, multiple plans, anything, and if worse comes to worst I'll drop out of school. I won't send her back to that dark place, to the metal walls and solitude that she doesn't need. 

I don't know. I'm scared, I'm so fucking scared.